We walked through the breezeway
A bunch of preppys walked by
"I hate white people"
She snarled
tilting her head like she always did
when she was disguisted
"Hey!" I shouted
"I'm White"
"You're tight"
"Home-girl for life"
Home-girl what exactly
did she mean?
She makes fun of the
anime geeks
metalheads
spazzes
the people I hung out with
at my old school
that used to be me
running around
saying random phrases
in Japanese
not giving
a rats ass in the world
who sees
I remember the Macantosh incident
gleet,
Clueless foxy,
RPing, Pwns Leeroy
Hugs, Duct tape Mafia
Llevas polka.
Now it's just
pound it
Homegirl for life
Fuck this shit
and
look at them
don't become like those dorks
I was them
I miss them
I want to go back
I just don't want to lose any friends
What do I do?
I miss Ana
Talis Poho Rhanna
I don't know what I'd do
if I lost them
I fear..........
That I might already have
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Comments
Anyway, you might want to expand your lines, the breaks are very abrupt and I don't see how all of them contribute to the poem. Lines should generally be complete thoughts unless you want to emphasize a particular word or phrase. Doing that too often takes away from that emphasis.
Keep at it!
--
War is Peace
Freedom is Slavery
Ignorance is Strength
--
You like pain?....*SMACK* Try wearing a corset
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